Haa... I sit here trying to type a post about my soon to be two year old. The little girl who was so quiet when I met her and now has spunk and a set of lungs.
Even with the battle of croup that has made from not only long nights but days..
So I took a moment to read a friends blog and she puts my name down and tags me. Seven things wow...

1. I have not eaten meat in 31 years. Do not miss a hamburger and have no memory of eating one. In the old days before chicken or fish at mc Donald's I ordered a Big Mac without the meat. The guy behind the counter would yell "Big Mac hold the cow".

2. I am a boob specialist. Gee wont be telling my kids that anytime soon. Working at Victoria Secret and run the front desk. Not my calling boobs are.

3. My house is a wreck. Trying to organize things has lead to a major mess. You inspire me Nicole. I have enough fabric for dozens of quilts. Time to put one together.

4. I love to bake hate to cook. Will attach my pumpkin bread recipe at the bottom. Make pumpkin pancakes at preschool that the kids love.

5. We are done expanding our family. Tough words but so right for our family. Sierra is meant to be the baby.

6. My dream has always been to live out in the country. A farm with animals.

7. I have 5 wonderful (ok they can be brats) kids and 2 step kids. My step kids have children the same ages of my kids.

Pumpkin Bread
Pumpkin Bread

3 cups suggar
3 ½ cups flour
2 tsp baking soda
½ tsp salt
1 tsp nutmeg
1 tsp cinnamon
1 cup oil
2/3 cup water
4 eggs
2 c canned pumpkin
½ cup chopped dates
½ cup chopped nuts
Chocolate chips
Mix dry ingredients in a large bowl. Make a well and place remaining ingredients into the well. Mix and place in well greased pans. Bake at 350 degree preheated oven for 1 to 1 ½ hours. Makes 3 small or 2 large loaves. 12 juice can.

We bid you goodbye.

What a sad week. It actually started over a month ago when our obnoxious neighbor called animal control. See we are abusing our dog the one we love. Let loose in the house and whom the baby think is a big stuff animal. His weight loss came fast and with kids under tow and teenagers I noticed it but did not find the time to run to the Vet. We did take him in and spent $500 to learn little. He had lost weight (since we told them first do they charge less?) and they took blood that did not look awful at all. We went home and spoiled him. Hot dogs, puppy food, love and care and more weight loss. I panicked and asked Chuck to take him in. See he can manage the kids and do and any news much better so why not? Back to the vet and $500 more and still nothing. They tried to x-ray him but he got to excited so they asked us to bring him in early and let him relax before they tried the next day.

I took him in Friday morning and she wanted to just take an x-ray. I said no he needs to relax first as the doctor ordered so please don't stress him out. I am thankful I did as when the call came I was with my kids and able to fall apart in company. They said the cancer was everywhere. I was asking about worms in his stools and if that could be it how could it be cancer and we were losing him. How long? and it only gets worse. It was time now. We asked if we could take him home and say our goodbyes ( this is with huge tears as I type this) and we did. We a family of loving children held, cried, red and just enjoyed our last hours. Our sweet baby is gone. At peace but gone... He passed 16 years to the day that I lost my sister. What a tough day...

Do children know? She is wiping his eyes did he know? We bid you goodbye for now but we will one day be together again...

Shake me baby...

So a little reminder is always good right? I have shopping to do tomorrow. Seems we are low on can food, diapers and a few basics that we need to survive what 5-7 days on our own. My husband better have thick skin and patience because I HATE earthquakes. So yes today is a reminder to get our shit together. Be prepared and buy what we need for so we wont need them :).

I Quit

So two weeks ago today I quit my job. Yes put in writing that I no longer would be working there as of today. Why am I still on the schedule then one would ask. Do people not take me serious. Ok so that is a dumb question as my children seem to follow the same path. Clean your room is one example. Put your dirty dishes in the sink is yet another.
Well the two weeks are up and they bought themselves a few extra days but two more weeks? See I agreed to take on more responsibility but I hate my boss. He is the typical Ambercombie guy with the attitude. Cute ok but stop dead in your tracks? NO. He is rude to customers and less then friendly. With this change in position came more money. Oh but wait I told you about a raise but I made a mistake over a month ago your not getting it. Thus the notice but it seems I must be doing ok at my job as they are trying to convince the district manager that I should get it. Now we are taking minimal and way below what I should be paid so give me a break. Like they are doing me such a huge favor.
So the real reason for posting my adorable kids I know. Wow how they grow. My son asks all the time. Mom is this healthy will it make me grow? He got so upset the other day saying that no matter how much he eats he isn't growing "look" he proclaims as he points to himself. The whole adorable package of cuteness.
His sister on the other hand is determined to drive everyone nuts. If she wants it its hers. If you have it she wants one. So all day we get "I want one" or "Mine".

Sunny days with dark clouds

We enter summer with all kinds of plans. The best is laying in bed in the morning and not having to rush off to anywhere. This has been the best part of summer so far. I will not question why my youngest is the best at snuggling for hours on end. Given a bottle and a bag of chips she can lay in bed (on dads side) all morning. This will teach dad not to buy potato chips.
Our four year old is at camp two days a week. He can choose one of so many things to do while there. They teach the kids knitting, sewing, beading. He can spend all his time in the clay room making what ever his hands want. What does my son do? He digs in the sand box and rolls down the grass hill. And with the best smile on his face and giggles that just make you want it to last forever.
Is there something about sand and grass that little boys cannot get enough of?
We are seeking a solution to screaming. Yes she at 20 months old screams if she does not get what she wants. You cringe with each shriek. It is ear piercing and it gets anyone and everyone staring at you wondering why you cannot control your child. I resort to bribing my 4 yr old to be on his best behavior, using inside voices no running you know the normal. I think we need to remain indoors for awhile till she stops screaming.
What else has she learned.. She rolls the windows down on the car with her tow. This is my second child that has figured out how to bend their toe to roll up or down the window. So triple digits and the window is down.
So the dark lining. It has been a tough few months but got worse the last few weeks. I finally pushed my insurance for another opinion. I have a lot left to see and do and I figured it was time for answers. What I got typical hmo style sorry we cant fix your ankles here try this brace oh and by the way your insurance wont pay for it. So I did to only learn it make my ankles worse. Walking is getting harder each day and still no fix. Only that what they say is causing it will also affect my heart.

Where did it go...

A month passes and again no entry no matter how much I promise. From little ones to teens and then work it just never gives a moment to journel.

Work moved into a new store that is 3 times the size of the old one and the largest store in California. That makes more mess and more annoying kids who do not get what work means. Is it that hard to ask them to do more then just stand around and stare? Or complain they did not get a 15 minute break at exactly the two hour mark?

Teens are good the normal being teens.

So my issue a screaming 19 month old. Where did that quiet child who made not a t peep when we got her go? She has this screech if she does not get her way. So what do you think happened? Yes you got it she was given her way to make the screaming stop and we created a big monster. So now we suffer as we fix our mistakes. Think I should warn our neighbors.

So today my neighbor asked if we lived on Whisteria lane. Our tiny dead end street that is impossible to find has a weekly visit from the sheriff. Not that any one house gets the call it is spread pretty evenly. Some are just dumb calls while others seem more interesting. So why was the crime investigation unit on our street the other night? No one knows still. The house is rented and the owner has no clue. The house is closed so you cannot see inside are they hiding?

How sweet they are

I decided to bake today and my little one decided today was the day to get a chair and find out what is on the counter.

Yes life is good when mom is to busy taking pictures and lets you eat powder sugar. Yummm

A Childs Rights Campaign

May 21, 2008
Dear Families and Friends, Simply put, the orphaned and vulnerable children of Vietnam need your help. Please join us on June 2nd by contacting Members of Congress and urging them to join the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Co-Chairs and sign their letter to Secretary Condoleezza Rice in support of the recommendations found in A Child’s Right Campaign for Vietnam."
A Pending Crisis
The U.S. Department of State has expressed concerns related to corruptive practices associated with intercountry adoption between the U.S. and Vietnam. In response to their concerns, the Department of State will allow the functional closure of adoptions on September 1, 2008 and thereby end one of the most basic of human rights: the right to a safe, permanent and loving family.
Not only will those orphans eligible for adoption continue to suffer the detriments of orphanage life, so will thousands of other orphans and vulnerable children. This is because the service providers engaged in finding U.S. families for Vietnamese orphans also provide a myriad of services to the most vulnerable of children.
As a result, the end of intercountry adoption with Vietnam also brings the end of social services such as family preservation and counseling. It also marks the end of humanitarian services such as educational sponsorships, clean water programs and many health related initiatives.
End Corruption, Not a Child’s Right to a Family
While Joint Council shares in many of the Department of State’s concerns, we believe the solution is not the termination of adoption and elimination of a child’s right to a family. Joint Council, its Member Organizations, NGO’s including Ethica—a leading voice for ethical adoption, the Vietnamese government and Members of the United States Congress firmly believe that the solution is a rational child-centered approach designed to strengthen services, regulate providers and prosecute violators.
A Child’s Right Campaign for Vietnam
In response to the looming crisis facing the children of Vietnam, Joint Council today--May 21, 2008—initiates A Child’s Right Campaign for Vietnam. A Child’s Right Campaign for Vietnam proposes a series of rational recommendations that
address the issues of abuse, protect the integrity of Vietnamese families and ensure the right of every child to a permanent, safe and loving family. The overriding goal of this campaign is very simple: to end corruption, but not a child’s right to a family.
As part of this campaign Joint Council delivered a letter to the Congressional Coalition on Adoption (CCA) Co-Chairs: Senator Mary Landrieu; Senator Norm Coleman; Congressman James Oberstar and Congresswoman Ginny Brown- Waite requesting their immediate assistance. We have asked the CCA and all Members of Congress to support the recommendations found within A Child’s Right Campaign for Vietnam and to work with the Governments of the United States and Vietnam to ensure that an MOA is in place on September 1, 2008.
The Department of State has expressed intent to negotiate and implement a new MOA with the Government of Vietnam. Joint Council applauds the long-term goals of the Department of State, yet finds the short-term path unacceptable. It is clear that the intent is also to allow the current MOA to expire while seeking a new agreement sometime in the future. By all estimates, the Department of State’s current path would result in the functional elimination of services, including adoption, for two years or more!
Finding such a scenario intolerable, we ask for your immediate support of this Campaign. The following page details how you can help us avoid this pending crisis. Only with your active participation will the children of Vietnam have a right to join a permanent, safe and loving family through ethical, professional and legal adoption.
On behalf of the orphaned and vulnerable children of Vietnam, those of us who work to serve their needs and the Joint Council on International Children’s Services, we extend our sincere appreciation for your coming efforts.
Sincerely,
Thomas DiFilipo
President / CEO

I suck

I have failed yet again to keep up on my blog. This seems to be the last thing on my plate and with all that is going on it seems to be forgotten all together.
We traveled to Edmonton Canada last week and it took a lot out of me. Packing for 3 kids and myself was work along. We never see temps below 30 so when you give me 18 below zero its a new ball game. I had to buy shoes as if we would be outside for more then 30 seconds to need them. Jackets which only I needed as I sat in the frozen car to warm it up before anyone came outside and toys which were all left home. They loved my husband but I cannot imagine them offering near enough to get me to move there. I love California and the United States that much more now. See we priced things out there and they are screwed. Their dollar went up and so did goods. Prices are crazy there and you don't get paid enough to compensate for it. So we are not planning on moving to Edmonton. This make my parents so happy too.
What I cannot believe is how close we are to our one year anniversary. I found a picture of S and she has changed so much. So one more? Stay tuned

Tug of War

Do you know that the USCIS who approves you for your 171H does not work hand in hand with the Embassy who approves you for your Visa to bring your child home? Is this another government tug of war at the expense of children. When you adopt from a foreign country you first go through a process to get your home study which you file with USCIS. They either accept you and issue a 171H favorable determination to adopt or deny you.
Knowing what we do yes a country,Provence,orphanage even an agency can do things illegally but when it is proven that nothing is concrete and the child is an orphan do we have to play political games. What is happening in Vietnam is proof enough that two government agencies cannot and will not work together. Investigations are done and it is determined several of the babies are in fact legitimate orphans but the second agency is still having to prove their own agenda and refuses to allow these orphan babies to come home. They are orphans it is proven time to step off your high horse and do what is right. Let these babies come home.

She wins every time...

Have you tried to reason with a 14 month old? She sees her brother get something she wants it. It took little time to figure out that chocolate chip cookies are a good thing. Now mind you she has no idea if its 8 am and not a good thing to be eating or 5 pm and its time for dinner, she just knows cookie and I want. She won again

But than again who can resist that cute smile. So as you see I am whipped by a 14 month old.

Not G rated

Post number two and I already want to rip the eyes out of our agency. Such aggression but you make the call and make any sense of anything they say. We want you to switch case managers is how it all started since I will not accept nasty emails or phone messages from her, to if we switch agencies they tell the new agency that they have to talk to miss stick up her butt first. Do you think this lady would return one phone call or even have a nice thing to say when you catch her in lies? So that big check we sent and they lost are they going to ask for it back and then answer our questions?

I wonder if the persons blog I read today talks to the same case manager? She seems to think that NOIDs for OUR agency are unusual (not that they didn't have them before the closure) and that some have been overturned. Seeing one is my friend I know that NONE have been overturned of ALL the 20 plus families. Where do they find that pixie dust they seem to be spreading around in our agency, my package has not arrived with it yet.

This seems to be the same thing that is happening in the China world as well. One agency says oh you will get your referral next year while agency b says 4 years. So for about $5000 you pay for the agency fee it is to lie to us? Not inform us? I make all the copies, pay all the postage, translation. What is the fee for?

The cute news is my little girl walking. I have the cutest shoes I bought in Vietnam that squeak when she walks. Now I know annoying but it is so cute its worth it. From this quiet little girl to this girl who squeaks when she walks and yells when she does not get her way. Yes she had cookies for dinner last night and there was no telling her different.

New Year New Dreams

Have you ever just felt like starting over? Clean the slate and let hurt feelings go? I have decided to start over with this new blog. This will be the only post that refers to the low life who stole a piece of us. Robbed my children of their sister and my husband and I of our daughter. You one day Faith International will meet your maker and like many other families we know that it will not be pleasant. You are not there for the kids and there are enough of us that you have lied to mislead or just ignored to show your true colors. You should be ashamed of yourselves.
That said its a new year and we move on. Can you believe it is already 2008? It seems like yesterday we were so worried about 2000 and the computers all freezing, banks closing, national security breached. Eight years later and what have we accomplished.
For one I have the most amazing additions to our family. Myles turned 4 as we added a sister to the family. And what does 2008 bring us? More dreams more promises more hopes. I so look forward to focusing on my family my life and my dreams.
So cheers to 2008 lets make this year rock. Bring on those referrals we cannot wait to see more beautiful babies finding their forever families...